Expectations

It is so easy to get caught up in the moment and expect too much from your horses. With social media in its prime, the bar gets set higher and higher everyday. Weather its from a strong desire to just perform well or added pressure to do more or be more, people expect more; they put pressure on themselves and expect more from their horses.

Often time is against people. They might make the time to go to a clinic with their horse and get all inspired but then sometimes juggling work, family and time for the horse can be a constant struggle. So when there is time to spend with the horse, the exercises that were going well at the clinic have now come undone and the pressure is on to get him back up to speed for fear of when the next time to work together will be. Sound familiar?

There are so many different common scenarios where humans get caught up in busy lives and forget that it’s amazing just the fact that the horse will let us pat him, let alone ride upon his back!

In this post I want to start to get you thinking lighter, along the lines of less is more. Look for the smallest tries from your horse and reward those to see how quickly they learn when the pressure is off you both and you take the time that is required. When you take your time you’re less likely to get flustered and less likely to create the horse to fuss which in turn will result in things happening quicker anyway.

In my post Forward, Forward, Forward I mention float loading as an example of expectations. This is such a great example as it is usually where most people run into trouble, usually they are strapped for time and in a rush to get the horse on the float, they need to be somewhere by a certain time; horses are incredibly sensitive animals, of course they can sense that something is up! It is so important to not let times like these get to you and to just go about what you’re asking as if you have all day to do it, you’ll find that just by changing your mindset and approach you will get a better more trusting reaction from your horse which will be a smoother and faster experience than everyone getting frazzled. If you have trouble with something like float loading or walking your horse over a certain obstacle try changing the way you think about it; rather than going in to the exercise with (I’m going to walk my horse over this or I’m going to get my horse to go on the float), try lowering your expectations. Go in with the approach of, I’m going to calmly, without any excess human emotion, introduce my horse to something new or something he doesn’t particularly like. There is no end result in mind, just being in the moment and introducing your horse to something and rewarding each try and blocking what we don’t want to encourage; if we lower our expectations and take away our emotions the horse will automatically be more inclined to trust and to listen.

Before attempting anything you want your horse in a learning frame of mind, meaning that he isn’t fresh out of the paddock calling out to his mate and running riot; he needs to be listening to you. You can achieve this by doing some ground work exercises and checking responsiveness to what you ask, it is important to know the difference between tiring a horse out and getting him in a learning frame of mind. You don’t want your horse tired and worked down, you just want to make sure he’s listening, they can still have plenty of energy and listen. You don’t want your horse on auto-pilot either, just because he is going around and changing direction when you ask doesn’t always mean he is listening, be sure you’re not stuck in a rut with your groundwork exercises, change it up and ask different things, really keep him on his toes so that you can be sure your horse is with you. Listening.

Now lets get back to your new mindset, you’re going to introduce your horse to something, you have no expectations, you are in the moment with no excessive human emotion, ready to reward the slightest try and make no fuss over the horse if he does the wrong thing! Your horse is listening, you’ve checked this with some exercises and you’re ready to either try something new or something he doesn’t like. It is important to not make a fuss if your horse doesn’t do something right away, there are a number of reasons why and the most common is because he is actually doing exactly what you asked; you need to be clear with your instructions so that when it translates across to the horse he is actually being asked what you have in mind, rather than you accidentally asking for something else. Another thing is people try to force things to happen again because of expectations. If you take your horse up to a tarp on the ground or the float and pull on him to make him walk in or over he will brace up, you haven’t given him time to think or look. Horses are flight animals they need to be sure that what they are doing is safe, it is unfair of us to just force them over or into something just because we know it wont bite them, that is not trust, trust is the most important part of any relationship and it needs to be equal and allow both parties to think, feel and act to be able to communicate openly and build a solid foundation of trust. If you come at things with a looser line on your horse and that more relaxed attitude and just let him stop when he wants you’ll find that he will most likely take a look or even a sniff and even perhaps go right ahead and do what you have directed. Some horses are away with the fairies and that’s OK too, because i’m sure everyone had those moments at least once in school, just simply redirect his attention back to what you are showing him and allow him to assess. Some people will say “ugh I don’t know why he wont do it now, he’s done it plenty of times before” again expectations, just because a horse has done something don’t take it for granted, it’s actually a really awesome thing if you asked something of your horse and he did it one time, it’s another kettle of fish altogether to keep things up and to keep progressing forward and not go backwards in training, again this is all to do with the handler and usually their expectations.

If we go back to the float and the tarp and make sure we are in the correct position and asking softly, closing the doors we don’t want and leaving open the one we do the horse will always take the open door. Depending on the horse the time it take can vary but every horse, if asked correctly and blocked accordingly, will go where they are encouraged. It’s the same principle when getting an unhandled horse on the float.If you go in all yahoo and push too hard, the horse has no time to think and their natural self preservation kicks in and you wont get anywhere, in fact you will only achieve giving the horse a terrible experience and run the risk of them getting hurt or hurting you.

If only people knew that horses are so much simpler than the human mind makes them out to be! This is where I want these blog posts to help you guys out, to get you thinking deeper, acting less and seeing positive results in your horsemanship journey. SIMPLIFY!

Take these expectations in the saddle and horses can get super frazzled, pressure put on them to perform things that they haven’t properly been taught or had the time to understand. If we as riders and handlers expect too much, when the results that we want are not being achieved we naturally tend to be more forceful, this goes against natural horsemanship. This is where people get stuck, they expect more and when things are not being achieved they go to a stronger bit or use more pressure or get a friend to help who gets up the horse and makes things more of an issue. It is so important to remember that while you can “make” horses do things this is usually in an act of fear, while you may get a result, these results WILL NOT LAST! A horse educated with force or fear will do things but not for you they are doing it as a result from you, eventually the horse will get fed up or even get nervous and scared, more so of you or what may happen than the actual obstacle or task at hand. Horses that are educated softly and properly will have the opportunity to understand and process what has been asked, they will be more inclined to trust and happily repeat things. Horses are very willing creatures, given the chance they will do the most extraordinary things for man; provided the horse has been allowed to chose to do so, as forcing or scaring the horse to do things will not end with a soft willing result.

If you want your horse to back up, rather than expecting 4 steps backwards, lower your expectations and ask for one step, if you’re really in tune with your horse you will know when to reward him for even thinking about shifting his weight back (with this the horse will not have moved a single step, yet when you ask again he will willing move back a step) if you reward your horse for even being present and trying you are giving him a form of encouragement to continue to try for you, if you pull at him and keep expecting more and more the horse will get confused because you haven’t made it clear enough what it is you’re asking because you haven’t given a reward or time to think or process; the horse will get frustrated because no doubt he’s tried a few things and dang it he just can’t seem to get a win…surely if you had a boss like that at work you would get frustrated and even begin to give up trying because nothing seems to please them and if it does it isn’t for long. How about riding softer, rewarding with a release of pressure for each try then ask for a little more then next time, I find horses take three asks when learning something new to fully get it and willingly accept the aid and respond softly and accordingly.

Asking for less and ending on a positive note will result in a softer more willing horse and faster achievements will be made…so why be in a hurry when being in a hurry wont get you where you want to be? Relax, take your time and remember that we are all different and learn differently so why expect your horse to be any different?

Rather than having the end result in mind (my horse is going on the float no matter what it takes) try for a more educated approach, (I want a soft, calm horse who will willingly load onto the float) and take the time it takes to get that. Who cares if you are late for something, any instructor or clinician worth going to will understand and if you’re not sure about how long something will take, allow more time, start earlier, your horse is worth it and so is your sanity.

Deep breath! You got this!